


Toast to the ones that we lost on the way

by justanoutlaw



Series: OQ Prompt Party 2020 [5]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Death, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2020-08-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:48:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25513090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanoutlaw/pseuds/justanoutlaw
Summary: Regina said she didn’t want more kids, but a series of unfortunate events continue to make her a mother.
Relationships: Evil Queen | Regina Mills & Roland, Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Robin Hood
Series: OQ Prompt Party 2020 [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1848304
Comments: 12
Kudos: 27





	Toast to the ones that we lost on the way

**Author's Note:**

> For Day 4 of OQ prompt party: #218. Queenie & DarkRobin die and Regina has to take care of their child(ren) + #184. “I don’t want more kids.” + #155. Roland doesn't want another sibling/sibling rivalry with the new baby

"I don't want more kids."

She had whispered that to Robin as they laid inches apart in Camelot. The baby he would father was on its way.

"I…"

"I'll help you raise Roland and this baby," she amended. "But after that, I don't want more kids."

He hadn't argued. Parenthood for both of them hadn't come how they expected. They loved their kids, there was no doubting that, but they also were afraid to go through it again. If they tempted fate, tried to reverse the potion on her body…Regina was afraid. She was content with their family of five.

Then he had been taken from her. Barely any time after he had been able to name his daughter (Bryony Scarlett Hood) or tell her that he wanted to protect her from Zelena, his life was taken. He died protecting both of his girls, leaving both of them behind in the process.

Regina took Bryony and Roland in, raising them alongside Henry. It's what Robin would've wanted. And she stood by what she said. She didn't want more kids.

Her other half, however, did.

The Queen and the other version of Robin found their realm's version of a fertility potion. It took a few tries but soon, they were pregnant. Regina was happy for them. They deserved it, if that's truly what they wanted. Regina got to know her niece and nephew through a magic mirror, visiting them when beans became plentiful.

She tried not to think about what could've been. Had Robin lived…had they changed their minds. Would they have a little girl with dark locks and sea blue eyes? Or perhaps a sweet boy with light brown waves and hazel specks that gleam? Or would they adopt?

She tried to keep her what if's to herself. Nothing could change the past. They weren't her children. They were her twin's. She had three lovely kids at home, two of whom would always remind her of the man she lost.

Alas tragedy could not stay away from them long.

After they had the twins, The Queen and Locksley were careful about their missions. They gathered their own group to help them. One night, however, they were ambushed. No amount of magic or gold tipped arrows could save them.

Just like that, Regina went from a mother of three to five.

The nanny traveled with the twins from the Enchanted Forest to Storybrooke. 2 year old Ash and Sunny plank her, heads downward. Regina kneels in front of them.

"Hey kids," she whispers.

"Mommy and Daddy are gone," Sunny makes out.

"I know," Regina pushes some of her dark hair out of her face. "But I'm here. And I'm not going anywhere."

The twins move into the mansion, sharing a room. There's space for them to have their own but Regina knows they need each other right now. They're 3 years younger than Bryony, and she takes to them like a duck to water. She shares her toys, shows them around the mansion. Henry reads them books. He's taken up a lot of slack around the house, helping Regina with the kids so she can clean and make sure everyone's fed and not going nuts.

One person is not happy with the new addition.

Roland refuses to talk to the twins. He won't share his toys. When given the opportunity, he'll hide out in his room. Regina knows it's an adjustment, but she also worries for the twins.

One afternoon, she takes Roland for a walk in the park. Henry watches the girls and Ash back at the house. Roland slides his hand through Regina's as they start their first lap.

"It's a nice day out," Regina comments.

"Hmm."

"Do you think maybe next time we could bring the twins with us?"

The 10 year old quiets. Regina sighs, pushing her chin length hair behind her ears.

"They really like you, Roland."

"I don't want them here."

"Why not?"

"They look like Papa."

Regina pauses, kneeling down to his height. Her knee aches on the sidewalk and she can feel her hosiery ripping, but she doesn't care. She strokes his cheek, running her finger over the dimple that reminds her so much of Robin's.

"You know they're not that Papa's."

"But they look like him. Especially Ash."

Regina nods. Ash inherited a lot of Locksley's coloring, especially his smile. Sometimes it's hard to tell the difference between the two Robins and the little boy.

Roland struggled with Locksley. They did their best to keep them apart in the beginning, but it wasn't long before they met. Roland knew he wasn't his papa, but it was still very confusing for him. After a visit with the Queen and Locksley, he broke down in Regina's arms.

"Why does that man get to be with Queenie but we don't have Papa?"

It was a question that Regina couldn't answer. And to save her little knight's heart from any more pain, it was decided that he would not see Locksley anymore. The Queen could visit and have talks via the mirror, but her husband was just too much for the little boy. Bryony faired better, but she had never gotten to know her father. Roland spent 5 years with his papa. It was just too much, even after another half a decade of them knowing each other.

Now, the twins were living with them full time. Another reminder of the man who wasn't their Robin and that somehow hurt even more.

"You look like your papa, you know," Regina points out.

Roland sniffles. "Really?"

Regina nods. "Yup. You have his dimples and his smile. You also have his bravery and compassion." Her eyes burn with tears. "I'm reminded of him every day."

"Peanut looks like him too," Roland mumbles, using his nickname for his sister. "She has his eyes and hair."

"That she does, my little knight. She also has his adventurer spirit." Bryony is often the leader of the pack, despite being the former youngest of the family.

Roland nods and Regina feels her lips tug up.

"Having you two is like having a part of your papa with me, always."

Roland tilts his head. "Isn't it hard?"

Regina considers the question. "No. Because I remember the best parts. Like how he used to give me the best hugs and how he made me feel like the most important person on earth," her voice breaks. "How he made me feel loved."

"We love you too, Mama."

"I know, love," Regina says, kissing his cheek. "But Ash and Sunny are the same way. They remind me of Locksley and my twin. How Queenie was fearless and witty. The way Locksley loved my lasagne, just like the twins do."

Roland nods.

"But they do make me think of your papa too, since Locksley looked so much like him. And I know that's hard for you." She sighs. "I know we didn't plan this, Rolo. I also didn't plan losing your papa or raising you kids alone."

Roland bites his lip. "I don't like that I can't look at them. It makes me feel weird."

"Oh, bud."

Regina takes him into her arms and presses a kiss to his cheek. He buries his head into her shoulder, her blue silk shirt getting wet with his tears. Slowly, she rubs his back and whispers comforting words into his ear.

"We're gonna figure this out," she mumbles after awhile. "One step at a time."

Archie starts seeing Roland again. He agrees to see Regina too, separately. Roland doesn't ignore the twins when they're in a room. He still can't look them in the eye, though. Regina realizes she's struggling with it all too. With Henry off to travel the realms, she has four kids under her roof. Four kids that look like the people she's lost along the way. It hurts more than anything.

But it also keeps a piece of them with her.


End file.
